Pelosi, Congress, Set Date For Kavanaugh Impeachment

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Amid a whirlwind of controversy this morning, Speaker Nancy Pelosi announced that she had directed Congress to begin impeachment hearings against Donald Trump’s Supreme Court justice pick, Brett Kavanaugh, on June 5th.

Insiders say Pelosi had been keeping the move a secret for more than five months, fearing backlash from the President’s psychotic fan base.

Citing articles pertaining to “moral disqualifications” and the previous unfinished investigation into the judge’s sexually predatory history, the third in line to the White House took no questions from the press, and released a statement only to Sandy Batt of the Washington Queefpost:

“With the election approaching and the highest court in the land being more important than even in an environment of the ‘Me Too’ movement, it’s time we finished what had been blocked from adequately starting with Kavanaugh.  A strong suspicion of wrongdoing and harassment still exists, and the President has never taken it seriously.  Impeachment is the only recourse, and when this animal is removed, the next President will choose his successor.  Trump will not, since he has demonstrated bad judgement already in that regard.  Let’s throw the bum out.”

Similar to the sucessfull impeachment trial of President Trump, Pelosi will be withdrawing funds to cover all legal and practical fees from the Social Security fund to an as yet undisclosed amount near 50 billion dollars.  It’s a fairly hefty amount that the Speaker insists is the unfortunate price to correct the mistake of a rogue President and provide justice and peace of mind to the American citizens.  Here we go again.

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